Thursday, October 06, 2011

Tired today...

I do not know what is wrong with me, but I can not seem to get enough rest these days. Maybe it is because my body is trying to get rid of these infernal sutures, or maybe it is because of my moon time, or maybe it is because I am overdoing it. Maybe it is a combination of all of those things, I don't know. All I know is I am feeling like a zombie and I do not like it.

My leg hurts a lot today, I had to break the pain pills back out just to walk today. I am not liking this rejection of the sutures thing at all, it is almost as bad as the break was. I feel like my leg is on fire and there is nothing I can really do about it.

Today I rested, played around online this morning, and held down the couch watching episodes of the show Sister Wife. It is an interesting show, I quite like it.

I am trying not to get frustrated with myself about not being able to do much without being exhausted. I have NO patience when it comes to myself, it bothers me that I can not do the simple things like clean the house as I once did. I feel better so in my mind I should be able to do everything just as I did before, and that is just not possible yet. I ran the vac, dusted my entertainment center and desk and cleaned the 2 glass tables yesterday and I still feel like I ran a marathon. No matter how much sleep I get, I am still tired. I hate it. I have been cooking, and Perth, thank goodness, has been doing the dishes for me. By that time of the day I just want to lay down and go to sleep, yet when I get in bed, even as tired as I am, I lay there, unable to sleep because I am just not tired enough to sleep.  Or maybe I am TO tired, I do not know. I am so glad tomorrow is Friday, it means I get to sleep in over the weekend. Jack had to wake me three times, and Alex had to wake me twice before I managed to drag out of bed this morning, which is unusual.

I guess I just need to be kinder to myself and let myself heal, but it is hard when the clothes hamper is overflowing, there is three loads to fold, and other things need to be done and I am just to tired to do it. Perth has been a huge help and I am so glad he is here. Jack has been as much help as he can I guess, but I know he does not want to do it so it makes me feel bad about it.

I need to work on laundry tomorrow I guess, but I do not intend to do much else. I wish I were the type to be able to lay back down and go to sleep once I get Alex on the bus but I get headaches, and even if I didn't, guilt keeps me up.

I sound like I am whining and I do not like that either, but I needed to vent I guess. I will just be glad when all this is over and I can move on and not be exhausted and in pain. At least I got 5 good days in between having the cast off and when the skin pain started. That is a good thing, 5 pain free days.

I guess that sums up the bitch and moan fest for today. Maybe things will be better tomorrow. I hope you all have a great day.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I'm glad you were able to vent. Just imagine how keeping all that inside would negatively affect your healing process. I'm sending good healthy juju your way and hoping things look up.