No Where To Go But Up: The Beginning.

I have had so many things swirling through my head to blog about. There is so much to share that it was overwhelming. After many nights of staring at an empty screen, I figured I might as well start from the Beginning.

I went offline August 20th or so. I was actually not spazzing as much as I thought I would. The first two days were rough...but I adapted pretty quickly. I read a lot.

From September through the end of November, things were rough. No income at all, ( long story that does not even matter now, but the gist is that the insurance company tried to screw us over once we agreed to a settlement. ) no more favors to call in, no one left to beg or borrow from. We just had no options left, and we just had to deal. We signed settlement papers in October. It was not anywhere close to what was deserved, but it was what it was and it was over. Then we found out it would still be another month before we got the settlement check. We still had another month at least to get through, when we already had nothing to live on.

Jack got very depressed, but surprisingly enough, I was totally calm.


There is a certain liberation...a sense of unexpected freedom when there is simply nothing you can do but breathe.

No options. No other choice but to just get through each day as it came. I felt serene and calm for the first time in a long time, even while part of my brain kept telling me I should be panicking. Everything worked out...just in time.

We limped along until Thanksgiving. As long time readers know, I am not a fan of the holiday season. This year was very nice though. Great non-traditional food, great time with the family. It was a nice day.

Two days later I was sitting on my back steps, crying my eyes out because we had gotten a notice of disconnect a few days earlier on our power bill, and as we were unable to do anything about it ( we had already been granted an extension ) and they were supposed to come out by 7 that evening to cut the power. We were already two months behind on our rent and were about to be served eviction papers. I was no longer calm, I was terrified.

I happened to look off to the right and saw our mailman had come an hour early ( I usually checked it when I went to get Alex off the bus ) so I trudged down to the mailbox and back. There was two envelopes from our lawyer, and I grabbed the one on top to open and I handed Jack the other one. He got his open first and it was just some legalese about the settlement. I finally got mine open and read the cover letter. At first I was confused...the letter made no sense, but as I moved it aside and saw the second sheet of paper, my eyes widened and I fell to my knees, sobbing.

Our settlement check had arrived...