"Noobs" vs "Not Noobs" or The Green vs The Seasoned

Noob, Newbie, Newb.

We have all probably heard the slang words that describe someone who is new to something. Especially popular in the gamer crowd ( of which I am a member of ), it is frequently used in a derogatory manner, to imply they are too new and therefore not worth the more advanced person's time and effort.

Love thy newbie, for thy was also once a newb!

In the gamer world, you have your seasoned players, who have logged countless hours playing said game, and then here comes someone who started just last week, who is still learning, and they may make some grievous error out of ignorance, which pisses the advanced gamers off and causes them to have fits of rage, complete with scathing insults heaped upon the "noob's" head, making that person feel like crap, simply because they have not had enough experience to know any better.

Another place this happens frequently is in the world of Paganism. Not everyone is this way, of course, and there are plenty of Pagans who love to help people new to their paths, but for years I have seen those who are more advanced, who have been on their paths for many years, who act just like the veteran gamers do. They have no patience for the "noobs"  ( I prefer Newbs myself and will use this spelling from now on ) or anyone who has not been on their path for years. Gods forbid they get asked a question by these green pagans. I have seen and heard and in weaker moments, given some of the most terrible tirades, speeches, and lectures given by seasoned pagans to those who are new to the Craft. Granted, in this age of technology, a wealth of information is at your fingertips on the internet, but first hand knowledge can make a huge difference in a person's path, especially if they have deeper questions than a simple internet search can give them. I have been on my path for 21 years, mostly alone, mostly self taught, but the knowledge I have gained from a few kind souls who were willing to answer a few ( and sometimes a lot of  ) questions helped me in ways I cannot describe.

So I am writing a bit of an open letter, first to seasoned pagans, and then to the Newbs out there.

Dear Seasoned Pagans,

Stop being asshats to Newbies. You, yourself, were once just as green as they are, and we are in a great position to stop a lot of the fear and misconceptions about being a Pagan. Maybe you were rejected in the early days of walking  this path, and now you feel you are entitled to do the same. Maybe you were totally self taught, you put in all the research, legwork, trial and error, and everything in between to be where you are, and feel that every person should have to do that. Maybe you simply do not have the desire, or the patience to teach anyone something that, even for "Public Pagans" is still at it's core, a deeply personal experience.

I get it. I have been there, and I understand where you are coming from. NONE of those reasons, however, gives us the right to treat these newcomers like unruly children. Granted, some Newbs are asshats, and will not listen, or think they know it all, and I will get to them in a minute. There are still ways to not rain insults on them and make them doubt if this is the path they want to be on, if all pagans are such jerks. Ours is a path of supposed acceptance and knowledge. One of the reasons a lot of us are pagans is because Christianity left us with a bad taste in our mouths so to speak. One thing I can say is that I have never seen or read about a patriarchal religion turning down newcomers who want to learn about their path or religion. I am sure there are some out there, but usually you can't get them to shut up teaching about it, they don't insult you and tell you that you are a newb and make them feel they are not worth spending time and effort on.

I am not saying we have to answer every question, or take everyone under our wings and show them the ropes. Hell no. I can't do that  myself. I have very little patience or desire to teach anyone about it anymore, even my son, who is fresh on the path. I will answer his questions, because he is my son and I love him, but I also direct him to go look it up for himself. My point is, it takes less energy and blood pressure points to give a basic answer and direct them somewhere they can find out the information for themselves, if  you happen to know a few places in particular, or to simply say "Sorry, I am not a teacher in the least, but so and so is, or do a quick internet search and you will find lots of answers" than to spend ten minutes or more ranting and raving at the person and making them feel like crap. You can decline to be a teacher without being a total jerk. Think about how you would feel is someone did that to you.  ( And maybe they did, and how bad did it make you feel?? ) Be respectful.

No one likes a know-it-all jerk.

Dear Green Pagans,

Don't be an asshat either. I know a whole world is opening up before you, and you want to cram as much info into your cranium as possible, but it took a lot of work to be where we seasoned pagans are today. I know you are probably reading everything you can get your hands on, and that is great, but there is a HUGE difference in book knowledge and practical experience. Don't be afraid to get out there and just do it. Be cautious, but do it. There is nothing anyone can tell you that will make up for good old fashioned experience. Even though there are very well known and respected public pagans, that does not mean that everyone you know who follows an alternative religion or path wants to pull up a chair with you and tell you everything they know. Even those who are willing to answer your questions still consider their practice a deeply personal thing. Do not act like because you read a few books, cast a spell or two, or conducted a ritual, that you are on even ground with someone who has been on the path for a decade or more. Don't be a know-it-all jerk to them either. Trying to lecture a seasoned pagan is a sure fire way to not get taken seriously, and make it to where no one wants to help you with anything. Some people will be happy to share with you. Many  people will not, and that is their choice. Keep searching, be respectful, and never stop learning. ( That goes for us seasoned pagans as well...things change all the time, new information is always being presented, and even though you may not practice it or adopt it into your path, keeping up with the times is always a good thing,  and can help you to understand the next generation of pagans.) This is not always an easy path, but it can be a very rewarding one.

So in conclusion, there is no reason that new and more advanced pagans can't find common ground, as long as a little mutual respect and a bit of patience is present on both parts. No one wants to be treated like an asshat, no matter how long you have been on a path.

I hope you will take that into consideration the next time you ask a question, or have the urge to blast someone to bits because they do not know as much as you do about something.

Have any thoughts about this? Tell me in the comments!

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Revelations: Part One

No...not the doom and gloom Revelations from the Bible. I have enough of that going on.

I mean personal revelations.

It has been a typical busy and crazy few days. This month has been a better one for me energy wise. I have several projects lined up, and for once, I have had the energy to work on them. I have been working on the dining table I have mentioned, repainted a kitchen wall, rearranged my bedroom ( which has improved our sleep quality so much it is amazing ) and a few other odds and ends.

 I was going to start painting Alex's room this week, but I have been having a flare up for the last couple of days. I still have energy, but my hands and arms are not being cooperative enough. I made a huge mess Monday...I had put the first coat of polyurethane on the table top, and was waiting for it to dry so I could lightly sand it before the next coat ( as the instructions say to do ) and I was making a pitcher of sweet tea. Right after I got the sugar stirred in I had a particularly violent muscle spasm in my arm, and I ended up knocking a gallon of sweet tea off into the floor. When the plastic pitcher hit the floor, the liquid in it EXPLODED everywhere. There was a tidal wave in the floor, and it splashed ALL over the walls, ( that we had just painted the night before ) the table that I had put the poly on not 20 minutes before, the ceiling, the stove, the cabinets, ME. I mean it was terrible. I was so frustrated as I cleaned sticky tea off of the floor and walls and everything...it made a huge mess of the table I was working on, as I could not wipe the spots out, and when I tried to wipe the walls down, the fresh paint which has not cured yet just wipes right off. So I had to repaint the walls, mop up that mess and wipe everything down. I was less than happy. The next day the rain came, and that is a huge trigger for me...so yesterday and today I am just hanging out and taking it easy, as I know until the rain goes away, I cannot rely on my body to do what it is supposed to.

When this happens ( the flare ups, meaning I have to take it easy ) I usually write, or spend time thinking about what to write. I have been having a blockage of sorts however. Not a writers block, as I actually have things I want to share, but a writers guilt blockage. I joined the Pagan Blog Project this year because I wanted to get back in touch with my sense of spirituality, and I thought that writing 4 posts a month on aspects of Paganism would help me do that. I think I managed all of two posts. At first things got a little hectic so I was going to just do a catch up post. I quickly found out that every time I had to come up with something to write about for it, I would stare at the blank web page and then suddenly want to go do anything other than write. I do not know how others may feel...but when I have something that I am supposed to be doing for my writing, and I am not doing it, I do not feel comfortable writing for myself in the blog, because I feel like everyone is watching my posts, waiting for the PBP post that I am supposed to be doing. Guilt sets in, and guilt gets in the way of my writing ANYTHING. My muse sits in the back of my mind and gives me disapproving looks.

So I started looking at it from all angles, as I tend to do. I realized that this was not the project for me, because I am not the kind of Pagan that does all the "pagany" stuff. I have no religion. I don't do the whole Goddess/God worship, I do not cast circles, or do huge rituals and all that stuff. I just do not feel the need to do all of that. I do believe in the sacred feminine, but males are just as sacred in different ways. Divinity is in all of us. WE are the Divine. I feel that all those gods and goddesses are manifestations of human qualities and traits. So if I call on Morrigan, I am not actually calling on a mystical entity..I am calling up the warrior spirit from within myself. I no longer have an altar...I gave my athame to my son. I still have a few "tools" and such, but it is because I enjoy them aesthetically, not because I need to use them to get into that head space to "work." So it was really hard for me to feel connected with the project, because sure, I could regurgitate Witchcraft 101 into 52 blog posts for the year...but it would not be very genuine, because I do not live that type of craft, and it would be something I dreaded doing every week. The project is awesome, and it deserves people who think it is fun and rewarding and will glean something good out of it. What it is does not need is someone who would feel almost like a fraud while writing for it. That is just not the kind of Pagan I am.

*Shrugs*

I still encourage everyone to go check out the Pagan Blog Project. I know a lot of amazing writers who DO practice those types of Paganism, and would have no problem writing about those types of things. One thing that has been awesome is reading all of the other people who have joined the project. I have read some really fantastic posts, even a few surprising ones. The best ones to me are the ones that take something seemingly unconnected to being a Pagan and spin it so that is DOES connect. I could probably do something  like that too, or maybe use the project to try to explain my version of the craft, but to be honest, I no longer feel the need to explain what I do to anyone. I have the same basic, and even advanced knowledge that most of us do, as many of us learn in the same way form the same sources..but what is different is how we each absorb that information and fashion it into the personal experience that being a Pagan is to us. I no longer feel the need to try to "fit in." I have my own set of practices and beliefs, and it works for me, it enriches my life and it makes me happy. At the end of the day, isn't that all that really matters?

I want to use my time studying and learning and growing...and writing about the things that resonate with me. As excited as I was to be a part of this, and as awesome as I still think the whole thing is..I realized that it is just not for me.

I wish the project and those who are participating in it great success! I look forward to reading all the great posts that they all come up with!

Stay tuned for Part Two coming soon!