Foodie Friday: Jesus Seeds

What? Did you say Jesus Seeds, Bella?

I did folks.

Today's post is about food, but it is not a recipe. It is about something that irritated the hell out of me and I wanted to post about it.

First, a confession: I love Candy Corn. I know, it is not even a food, it is sugar and food coloring, coconut oil and some waxy stuff. They are terrible for you, they make my teeth hurt, and all kinds of stuff. I.Don't.Care. They only come around once a year, I buy a little teeny bag and it takes me 3 months to eat it, because I can only eat like 5 at a time. I love them. Sue me.

Jack and Alex and I were shopping for groceries the other day, and Jack came up to me with a HUGE bag of candy corn. I told him I did not need it, as I had bought my yearly teeny tiny bag at the dollar store earlier. He said "No, I do not want you to buy it, I want you to LOOK at it!" So I glanced a little closer and saw that it was a giant pack of candy corn in little individual packages, to give out to trick or treaters. So I thought. Upon closer inspection, I saw the name of the candy on the bag. This is what I saw:

(No this is not my pic. I got it off of google, and every time I tried to click on the blog it came from, it told me "Page Not Found" so if anyone DOES know where it came from, let me know and I will link to it. )

Yes, that bag DOES say Jesus Harvest Seeds.

Jesus Seeds.

Complete with a scripture on every little package!!

My response: What the fuck?

I was immediately irritated. Yes, I am considered Pagan, because I am not a Christian, but come on folks. Everyone SHOULD know by now that Halloween has never been about Satan or Devil Worship or ANY of that shit. It used to be about Celtic people dressing up in ancient times on Samhain to ward off ghosts and evil spirits. To ward OFF evil spirits, not WORSHIP them or BECOME one.

From History.com:

Straddling the line between fall and winter, plenty and paucity, life and death, Halloween is a time of celebration and superstition. It is thought to have originated with the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, when people would light bonfires and wear costumes to ward off roaming ghosts. In the eighth century, Pope Gregory III designated November 1 as a time to honor all saints and martyrs; the holiday, All Saints’ Day, incorporated some of the traditions of Samhain. The evening before was known as All Hallows’ Eve and later Halloween. Over time, Halloween evolved into a secular, community-based event characterized by child-friendly activities such as trick-or-treating. In a number of countries around the world, as the days grow shorter and the nights get colder, people continue to usher in the winter season with gatherings, costumes and sweet treats.


So yeah. That was then. NOW for most of the population it means letting your kids use their imagination and dress up like their favorite character and go out and get a bunch of candy and have fun being out after dark. In no way has it ever been about being evil or worshiping the devil, at least as far as I know. Some freaky folks may do that on a personal level, but that is all them. So instead of letting my kid go out and have fun playing dress-up and scoring some sweets, now I have to have someone shoving their religion down my kids throat because they are trying to combat evil. My kid pretending to be a princess or Woody from Toy Story is evil? Does that mean when the preacher's 5 year old is in her room playing dress up on an average Tuesday that SHE is evil and worshiping the devil? Of course not. She is a little kid using her imagination to do something fun. Just like kids do on Halloween. What day it is should not matter. What folks did hundreds and hundreds of years ago should not matter either, ESPECIALLY when there was nothing evil about it in the first place!

It is not the name of it, it is not just because the fact Christians did it or that I hate Christians, because I don't, I love everyone until they give me a reason not to, it is because they are trying to turn something that is not evil into something to be afraid of, to be a sin, to control people. I do not care who did it, or what they call it, the reason behind it is just flat out wrong.

It irks me. What you teach your congregation in the privacy of your own church is your business, but when you start plastering scriptures on candy and other stuff, where my kid can be influenced, I have an issue with that. I would not go and plaster spells on candy and give it to YOUR kids, and I do not appreciate you doing it to mine. My kids will make their own decisions about what religion they want to be, if they choose to be ANY religion, when they are old enough to understand it for themselves and make an educated decision. I do not influence my kids to be Pantheist, as I am, nor does Jack influence the kids to be Pagan/Agnostic. Hell, my MOTHER, who IS a Christian, does not influence the kids to be Christian.

Folks will not agree with me, and that is okay, but this is how *I* feel about it. I do not want any religion, including my own ( even though it is not a religion ) to influence my kids before they are ready to logically examine them all and make their own choice based on what calls to them. It is CANDY for Pete's sake.

*End of mini rant*

I would also like to note that in the middle of writing this, when I went to get Alex off the bus, in the mailbox was a package. In that package was a personalized brand new shiny black bible with Jack's name on it, given to him by his father ( who is in prison ) and on the inside cover, it was dedicated to all three of us. Jack, myself, and Alex. Jack raised his eyebrows and walked off, but I spent a few minutes flipping through it. I LOVE it. I clutched it to my chest and breathed it in. I held it in a sense of reverence. It is gorgeous and in large print. I am no stranger to the bible, and I can quote scripture better than most Christians can, and I adore this book. Just because I do not subscribe to the religion itself does not mean I can not appreciate the words and the thoughts behind it, especially in the New Testament. I will read it from time to time, I still do that, and I will save it for Alex when she gets older. She may or may not decide to be Christian, but it is a beautiful book, and I do not attach all the stigma and dogma to it that most do. It just became an instant heirloom, and even if she is not Christian later, I will implore her to keep it and give it to her kids, should she choose to have them. My problem has never been about the book, or even about the words, it is about the people who twist it and use it as a weapon to inspire fear and discrimination and judgement.

I think Jesus was a wonderful scholar, healer, and all around bang up guy. But he was still at least part human, depending on what you believe, and he had emotions and thoughts, fears and doubts. I am not in any way bashing Christians. If it were Muslims with passages from the Quran or Jewish passages from the Torah, a Pagan with spells, or whatever holy book from whatever religion, I would be just as upset. People need to be free and allowed to make their own choices, and I feel that this taking over of candy and putting scriptures all over it and trying to turn it into something it is not, or turn it away from something it is not, is crossing a line. It is candy. Not a religious tool.

Strange days

It really has been such an odd week.

I had to put my foot down to Vix and her crew about using my house phone as their phone. Well, mostly her kids using it to call them when they decide to stay out till all hours of the night. If it is an emergency, that is one thing, but when you are knocking on my door at 11 at night just to call and see when they ( their parents ) might be coming home, I have a problem with that. Especially when it was almost every single night. The dog would freak and bark, which would wake Jack up, which means he was pissy with me at being woke up. Yeah, that had to stop.

Tonight was fun too, they decided to come to MY house while they were fighting, bringing drama to my very carefully tended drama free zone. I told them to take that shit right back across the fence. I love Vix, but they have issues that bother me, especially when it drags me into the middle of their mess. No thanks.

I still have that feeling of running around like a chicken with my tail feathers on fire. The messed up part is I am running ragged yet it seems NOTHING is being accomplished. Thank goodness for Jack, once again. He got to come home early today due to the 132 degree temp in their shop, and he decided to clean out all the cabinets I can not easily reach. Those being the ones over the fridge and over the washer and dryer. He even moved the shelving in one of the washer cabinets so I can finally put my washing soap, softener and stain treatment bottles in there out of the way instead of sitting on top of the dryer, looking all cluttered.

In the cabinet over the fridge he found a wealth of old cooking magazines I forgot I even had, so over the weekend I will be cutting the stuff out I want to keep and file them away in my recipe box.

We threw a lot of stuff away that had been in those cabinets for YEARS. Felt good to finally toss that stuff.

I am hoping I can get him to help me in our room this weekend. I am not going to paint it until Alex goes back to school in just under two weeks, but I want to go ahead and get the bookshelf and bed moved and I need his help to do it. Not to mention weed through all the clothes I have to part with and realize I am never going to fit in them again or if I do they will be so far out of style there is no reason to hang on to them. Same for Alex's clothes, but hers is a matter of getting rid of the stuff that no longer fits. We only have a few days to get her some school clothes and I am nervous, as we are totally strapped for money and can not really afford to get her anything. We do at least have all the supplies she needs for the classroom.

I know I have been talking a lot about projects we are working on for the house, and it probably seems that we are blowing money. I assure you we are not. All the wood he is using to make stuff is salvaged. Did not cost us a dime. I spent 12 dollars on the gallon of paint for my room, and 4 dollars total for the two small cans of paint I used in Alex's room. We re-purpose a lot of stuff, so other than the floor tile ( 10 bucks a box ) and the paint, everything else has been free. Him being a mechanic he has all the tools we could ever need, and as his dad was a wonderful carpenter ( as a hobby, not by profession ) he learned a lot from his dad, so he is making things instead of us having to buy them.

I don't know, things are just...odd. Not bad, just strange feeling.

Maybe because there is a sense of anticipation, with school starting again soon, Vix and her crew deciding after 2 months of me feeling in limbo not to move to the place they were looking at, and several household projects in the works.

Not to mention we are both getting tired of clutter and such. We have purged just about all we can, now it is a matter of finding a place for it to live neatly. It gives me such a burst of energy when he helps me. Makes me feel motivated when he joins in and helps me. I like the feeling of us working on things together.

I guess that is all for tonight. Tomorrow is Friday..( okay since it is after midnight it already is Friday lol ) and I do not have to cook and I get two whole days of Jack being home and doing stuff with me yay!

Have a great weekend guys and gals!

Sorry, your just a pretty face...

So I got horribly offended. Buy a friend none the less.

I was talking with a friend, and made the offhand comment that I was up to 91 followers on Google friend connect and over 40 on Networked blogs. This ( male ) friend then proceeded to say "Lucky you. Female, redheaded, beautiful. Like you are surprised?"

Excuse me?

So apparently the only reason I have followers is because I am cute. It has nothing to do with the fact I am a pretty damn good writer if I say so myself. Nothing to do with the fact I am humorous. Nothing to do with the fact I am intelligent. Nothing to do with the passion in my writing. No. None of that matters. It is because I am "hot" ( which, I am not ) and no other reason.

95% of my followers are female. Last time I checked, most women do not blindly follow someone simply because they are good looking. I do not care if you are the most beautiful woman in the Universe, if I do not like what you have to say, I am not going to waste my time following you. I like to think most other women are the same way.

Then it came out that there was jealousy there, over my writing, and the fact I have more followers. Then it moved on to because they were having a rough time.

I say again...EXCUSE ME???

So because your having a rough time, that gives you the excuse and the right to insult my intelligence and that somehow justifies what you said and makes it OKAY??

I don't fucking think so.

If people do not like the way you write, who cares? Unless you specifically write only for others to read, then who gives a rat's ass how many followers you have, you write for yourself. If it Does bother you, then there is an "AHA!" moment, because obviously your kidding yourself when you try to say it does not matter who reads you, then you bitch and whine about how no one comments or you don't have many followers. If you DO care that people read you ( and of course it is perfectly acceptable if you do, we all like to be well received  ) and you are not getting a lot of the kind of response you want, then change your writing style and most definitely the subject, but don't you DARE fucking insult my intelligence with your shitty comments like that.

Yes, I am pissed off and insulted, and after I have cooled off I may have not written this post, but I want to because not only does it let me vent, ( and, as this is my blog, I can say any thing I want on it ) but this may have happened to others, and damn it I want them to be mad about it too, because a lot of my followers are so intelligent, and funny, and witty, it almost intimidates me, and that is pretty hard to do. I have the utmost respect for these people, male and female alike, and to think that there are people out there who think the only reason they get anywhere or have any sort of success, be it large or small, is because they are "hot" burns me to a CRISP!

I value intelligence above all else, and anyone who has known me longer than five minutes knows this...and my friend is more aware of it than most...so not only am I hurt and angry that he said it at all, that he said it about ME, knowing me so well, and knowing the importance I place on intelligence, he might as well have slapped me upside the face. I sat here and I literally had my mouth hanging open, I was so stunned. Then I saw red. People, I am a redhead, and yes I can have a temper, but it takes a LOT to get me angry. I do not mean irritated or pissy, I mean full on ANGRY, and this made me blow off the charts in seconds!

Some of you may think I am making a big deal out of it, and that is fine, but folks, this hurt me and angered me and shocked me all at the same time. Women have struggled for centuries to be on more equal ground, to have it known that we are worth more than a maid and a cook, to have people realize just because we have boobs and lady bits, does not mean we have no brain cells. I love to cook, I love to be a housewife, but dammit there is SO much more to me than that! I have spent my whole entire life learning and studying and using my brain to as much of it's full capacity as I can as a human obtain.

So for someone to say the only reason I have success in whatever I am doing must be because I have a pretty face is akin to saying I am a freaking moron and it makes me angry.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. What a jerky thing to say. Jerky McJerky Face!

Or as my other best friend would say..."YOUR MOM!" (inside joke to make me feel better lol )

This now concludes the Bella Freak The Hell Out Hour, we now return you to your regularly scheduled program, already in progress....

Am I a Bad Witch?

The month of October, the highlight of most Witch's Year, is well underway. The Halloween decorations have been in the stores since late August, houses are decorated already, the internet sites I frequent and the games I play are all decked out in their spooky finery. Everyone is in a state of anticipation and creamy goodness.

Except me.

Am I a bad Witch for wishing October were just done and over already? The contests and 31 days of....( and no I am not calling anyone out in blog land, because all that stuff is awesome fun lol ) is all over the internet..and it is all great fun, I have entered a jillion of them myself, but this is not what Samhain is about!

Maybe it is because so many Witches live in places they can only truly express themselves and come out of the Broom Closet for a single month out of the year. I get that. Maybe I have a hard time because even living in a place where the God Fearing and Gun Toting  people abound, ( And yes I am a gun toter too lol ) I have not been in the Broom Closet since I was like 15, I have a harder time relating.

Maybe it is because historically, the month of October sucks for me, with the exception of my babygirl's birth, even though she was born at 28 weeks, she survived and never suffered any health problems or delayed development over it.

I feel the same way about Yule/Xmas. Everyone is so worried about the commercial aspect of it, no one talks about or pays much attention to the real "reason for the season", no matter what religion they are.

Or maybe it is because the decor in my house is "Halloweeny" year round, so it desensitizes me to a degree.

Maybe it is because I have had 4 hours of sleep and I am grumpy and feel like "listening" to myself bitch, who knows lol.  I take that back, I am not grumpy, just tired...and when I am tired I tend to be more open with things that bother me.

In blog land, of the umpteen dozen blogs I follow ( and love, or I would not follow you lol ) very few have posted anything about Samhain, what it is, what it means to them, things they do for Samhain, things like that. Most of it is "Click here and here, and here..oh and here and here, to maybe win a shrunken head on a stick" (Please Goddess don't let any of the blogs I read actually be giving away a shrunken head on a stick or I am dead meat, oh please oh please) Of which I have done more than once this month *winks*

I guess I just expected Pagan blogs to be more...Pagan. Now don't get me wrong. I do not mean one of those stiff and formal types who have a 48 page ritual to honor the Dead. Those bore the shit out of me. I am eclectic and informal for a reason. It is who I am.

I don't know, maybe I am just rambling again. I do that a lot lol. I guess I just expected more from the Pagan Community at large this time of year. One of our local Pagan Pride festivals is this time of year, and I remember when it used to be about Pagans, and what we are, and what we do, and what it means to us. Now, it is about selling T-Shirts and buttons and posters that say " I survived the  Pagan Pride Festival of 2009", complete with little hordes of people with torches and pitchforks. No, I am not kidding. I know a few of the vendors this year, and have seen the template with my own two eyes. Funny? Yes. The point of a Pride festival? No lol. Not to me anyway.

I just feel like a bad witch at times because I do not buy in to all the other stuff everyone else seems to go apeshit for this time of year. I guess it has to do with my underlying issues with commercialism.

Well hopefully ya'll are not saying " Oh no that bitch did NOT just make a reference to me!" because I was not doing that. This is something I have had issues with for years, and I have only been a blogger for a few months lol. Like..3 of them..it is something I have wanted to give a voice to for a long long time.

Maybe there are others like me, who feel the way I do, or maybe it is just me and everyone will come down on my head for this. I don't know. Either way is okay, because regardless of what anyone says, I will have their answers and will know if I am alone in my thoughts or if others maybe wish it were a little more that what it has been as well...

Thanks for reading my ramblings lol..

Music of the Moment: Little Earth Quakes by Tori Amos*

More Awards and a rant of sorts...

For those of you who do not like or see the point in blog awards, or my opinion about them, feel free to skip this one lol...

Last night and today I got two more awards, one from Rowan and one from Mother Moon, which can be seen in my side bar. I want to thank both of these lovely ladies for bestowing me with a bit of sunshine to my mind over the last couple of gloomy and rainy days.

I guess now is the time to throw my two cents in about blog awards. Some people find them bothersome for whatever reason they have ( and they are all valid and good reasons mind you ) and let's face it, we ALL have our pet peeves, even in the blog world. Mine happens to be commercialism. Nothing wrong with it by itself, money is money honey, but as far as I go, if I have to wait 20 minutes for your page to load because of all the ads and crap on it, I am not going to linger there and really check you out like you deserve, because even as big of a multi-tasker as I am, unless your title or synopsis in my reader or dashboard REALLY caught my eye, I am not going to bog my machine down trying to load it you know?

Anyway, about the blog awards. I do not write so I can receive awards, I write to fulfill a personal need. However, because I do write in a public form, the fact that people who read me, even perfect strangers, like what they read enough to think of me for these awards is a honor. I may or may not "pass it on", but if I do, it is not because I want to annoy the person with blog clutter, it is because their blog is something that I enjoy, and it moves me or speaks to me in ways that I would like to let others know about, and let the author or authoress themselves know how much I appreciate and enjoy their work. Because even if you do not want or require the praise or acknowledgment, it still gives one a sense of satisfaction, and a sense of accomplishment, even if only for a fleeting second, to know that someone out there liked what you wrote enough to give you props for it.

On one hand I guess it is a good thing that this topic has come up in so many blogs, because at least you know who not to send them to anymore right? LOL. Kidding....

Seriously though, everyone's opinion is as valid as the next persons, so its all good. I just want to let the people who have or ever will send me an award know that  I have been and will be SO grateful and appreciative and a little humbled each time....

Hell, if nothing else, this topic is sort of like a writing prompt if you look at it. Even people who do not post much has sounded off about this, some for it, some against it. Writing is gooooood.

*Music of the Moment: Novocaine For The Soul by Eels*